After a week of meeting people i have never met and finding friendships in people that i may never seen again, i can’t help but wonder why i used to care so much about it all. I wonder why i worked so hard to try and force it. Something as beautiful as a friendship should be easy, not saying that bumps won’t come, but when you find yourself unhappy more times than not, forcing it obviously isn’t working it. People change, grow apart, mature, in different ways. They will never stop being close friends, but the influence i need and want to surround myself with just wasn’t ever there. 

God has placed quite a bit on my heart this week. 

“Ruin my life, for the plans that i make.” It’s time for me to stop doing and start asking. It doesn’t matter what i want if it isn’t glorifying to Him.
“You are stronger, You are stronger, sin is broken, You have saved me. It is written, Christ is risen, Jesus You are Lord of all.” No matter what i am going through, He can handle it. I need to grow my roots deep in the Lord, and strengthen my core, so that when storms hit and my ground is shaken, i am firmly planted in Him. I had lost sight in that.
“You waited for me, i searched for you. What took me so long?” He has been here all year as a ran further and further away from him, without even realizing it. What took me so long to return? Why did i run in the first place? 

I’m coming back.